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He pulls away when you get close
he pulls away when you get close / Dating / 11:06 AM - Saturday May 17, 2008
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A Thinker (Female, 22-25) asked:


yes i have been seeing this guy for a while now, and like int he beginning he and i went on a couple of dates no big deal we like hanging out with each other, than i heard from people that he was a player so i steered away from him as much as possible, he still found me attractive, and cute and always wanting to dance with me. Now i have hung out with him a couple of times and last night was big, i mean we went out he paid for everything drinks, dancing, food and they went back to his place, we made out but no sex, i haven't had sex with this guy. but then he lead it out, hes like i we have to talk about us, hes like i got really hurt by this girl a year ago and he wanted to get married to her but she dumped him and now she is getting married to this other guy. he hasn';t healed and he is like cna we just be friends and figure out what i want. i got close and we both like each other we have established that, and hes opening up to me more and more, i do'nt know what to do. Hes pulling away giving the talk, and i dont know waht to do.


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A Career Woman (Female, 46-55, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: baddgirl


There is nothing to do. Be his friend. Don't have sex with him. Take it from there.

DO NOT have sex with him!

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A Mr. Nice Guy (Male, 36-45, Other Profession) answered:

Screenname: slapshot


Knowing that he is a player you gotta be careful. This can be a song and dance to get the sex that didnt happen. Give him your shoulder and save the good stuff for a better time!

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A Thinker (Female, 46-55, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: spitfire815


Just be his friend for now, give him ur shoulder & NOTHING else.....smile:=)

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A Thinker (Female, 46-55) answered:

Screenname: idealady


Sorry to have taken so long to respond. I haven't been available. My advice: You are young; don't try to make this relationship work. Have fun, play the field, but be careful!! If it is meant to be, it will work without effort. In the meantime, you'll be available should someone else come along. Have you asked him about the rumors you heard? (That he's a player.) Maybe that is him; maybe it isn't. Maybe that was him and he's changed his ways. But give him the opportunity to respond. You'll hear that, "I've been hurt" is a cop-out. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. But he shouldn't use it as an excuse. If you think you want to give it a go, let him know that he's got to be willing to take chances, regardless of how many times he's been hurt before. Continuing to try out new relationships is the only way he'll ever find one that's right. Otherwise he'll have the never ending hurt of a life alone.

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